Computers: Getting Past the "Dummy" Stage!

by Alfred R. Bredenberg

If you're like a lot of people of my generation, you probably feel that computers are programmed for one purpose only: to make you feel like an idiot.

Maybe a friend gave you their old computer or maybe you even bought a brand new Pentium. The first time you turned it on, all these boxes and tiny pictures popped up on the screen, but all you could make it do was go "beep!" Or maybe you turned it on and all you got was this:

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Now you can hardly stand to go near the thing and the only one who can get anything out of it is your ten-year-old.

You are not the dummy
Well never fear. You are not an inferior life form. Actually, one of the biggest problems with computers is that they are incredibly stupid. When it comes down to it, they only know two things: "on" and "off." Computer programmers have been trying for years to get computers to understand the simplest things that people try to tell them -- with marginal success.

However, in spite of its limitations, a computer in the hands of a knowledgeable (and persistent) human being can get a lot of work done. Here are some things you can do to gain a reasonable level of expertise in operating a computer:

Read the manual
Although computer manuals are not famous for their clarity, they can help you get going. More than likely, you won't need to read the whole thing, especially just to get started. Start by look through the table of contents and flipping through the book just to get a general idea what's covered. Most computer manuals have a "Getting Started" or "The Basics" chapter. Go through this chapter and maybe some other chapters near the beginning. Do it in front of the computer (with the computer on). Following the manual, go through the "how-to" procedures step by step.

Most computer manuals have a "Troubleshooting" section for when the computer makes mistakes or can't understand you or gets snarled up in all those "yeses" and "noes." Also, most manuals have an index in back that can direct you to places where specific subjects are discussed.

Get a "dummies" or "idiots" book
At most book stores you can get books such as "PCs for Dummies" and "Windows 95 for Dummies," published by IDG Books. This kind of book is usually much more useful than the manufacturer's computer manual. Just remember that you are not really the dummy! A computer with the circuitry of your brain would have to be very big, say about the size of a small planet.

You can also get training videos that will get you up to speed on computing.

Attend a course or seminar
Your local community college or adult education center probably offers a basic computing course for PC or Macintosh. A computer vendor also might offer seminars. A little training can give you a lot of confidence and help you get over the techno-willies.

Make use of telephone technical support
Especially if you have just bought a new computer, you are most likely entitled to free or inexpensive technical support. Search through your manual and product literature and you will probably find the right number to call.

If you are using Microsoft Windows, you will usually need to call Microsoft for tech support. Most obstacles to getting your computer to understand you are related to the software and operating system, not the machine itself.

The technical support representative will be able to help you with problems by walking you through procedures step-by-step. Make the reps help you. That's their job. They know better than anybody how stupid a computer is, and most of them are patient and respectful.

Use "Online Help"
Here, "online Help" refers not to the Internet or AOL but to the Help functions of your software itself.

If you're using Windows, most program screens will have a drop-down menu labeled "Help" near the top of the screen. Click there and then buzz down and click on "Help Topics" or "Contents" or something like that. If you're using Windows 95, you can click on the "Start" button then buzz up and click on "Help."

Help is easy to use once you figure out how it works. The opening Help screen will give you a list of topics. To find out more about a topic, click (or double-click) on it. A window will pops open with more information.

Online Help can be a convenient way to deal with problems and get your questions answered. Some Help programs provide tutorials that will walk you through the most important procedures. Online Help provides quick answers for questions and problems.

Learn to type
Especially if you are a guy, chances are you are not much of a typist. Not that one sex or the other is better suited for typing, but the fact is most of us didn't get trained for it in school.

If you're going to use a computer, I would suggest learning to type. You don't have to be fast -- just get yourself beyond the "hunt and peck" stage. Take a course, or do like I did and get a self-teaching manual. You can even get a computer training program for typing, such as "Mavis Beacon Teaches Typing."

Go ahead and try things
Experiment with your computer. Most likely you are not going to break anything. Open all the drop-down menus. Click on the buttons. Open the programs. Find out what everything does. The only thing you really have to watch out for is "settings." Avoid changing anything labeled a "setting" "option" or similar term unless you know what you're doing based on the manual or online Help.

If you think you have messed something up on your computer, just call up tech support. That's what they're there for!

Al Bredenberg is a writer and creative consultant. He is the author of "The Small Business Guide to Internet Marketing," an electronic book. To get in touch, send e-mail to Al Bredenberg or visit his site at http://www.copywriter.com.